this october 2011, bring me a lot of sadness moment where i can't help myself to get away from it even it the oldest brother in the family. last 2 months i losing my usu, allahyarham hasbullah bin bujang which i'm not there when his been buried. aku hanya mampu melawat beliau 2minggu sebelum beliau passed away(13 august 2011). i still remember the last word i spoken to him before his gone while he just nod his head due to oxygen pump on his mouth. i can't keep sad when the word play in my mind. when i got the holiday's i when to his cemetery crying by myself. i do love him so much. aku sedih bila xmenatap wajah beliau untuk kali terakhir. aku sedih sebab xsembahyang jenazah untuk beliau. aku sedih sebab x usung beliau buat kali terakhir. semoga roh beliau di cucuri rahmat. amin ya Allah
having hari raya without pak su is most boring day for us and especially me. nothing to waiting for at kampung. suddenly, my father spoiled the day when he busy working. even on first day hari raya, he can't make himself at home in the morning for hari raya prayer. i saw my mother crying that day even she say she's okay.
i am lost now.my father, someone that i believe the most come out from thing that i can't believe he do it. kejadian hari itu sungguh membuatkan aku nampak lemah bila xdapat pertahankan mak. mak cry all dayuntil now. waiting for the call from father. i don't really know what will happen next. biarlah aku tanggung sorang masalah aku.
aku dah cukup dah dengar those promises but in the end,nothing happen with the promise. it just a promise but it mean something.